I like to think of the world and life as a use of energy.

[MUSIC PLAYING] As long as you have the life power to keep on making order out of disorder that is the function of life.

And the minute physical life stops everything about you will revert back to chaos.

And that moment when you cease having the ability to make your mark in the world as a human, when that is gone, I really don't I don't feel sadness for the body that is left.

[MUSIC PLAYING] The Latin word for suicide is killing yourself, and that's exactly what it is.

I mean there's no point in - in arguing whether, you know, I'm killing myself or not.

I am.

And I'm doing it with assistance.

Your mom has always asked you, I saw this point several times in some of the things you've written and done.

She's asking you to do what you believe is moral, ethical, that you're comfortable doing.

She's just trying to really express to you how she does want to live, and how she doesn't want to live.

[mm hmm] And I think that's the most powerful thing.

[mm hmm] I know what an impossible thing I'm asking.

And I also want you to be able to know that that I want your feelings respected in this.

And if one of these things are easier for you to do than another, I want you to keep that in consideration.

[MUSIC PLAYING] I think that objects play a part in the continuity of lives.

And this is the wonderful thing about vintage items and antique items.

They are the objects that survived all the vicissitudes of life.

There's a tea set that I bought for myself when I was a young mother and completely overwhelmed with maternal responsibilities.

And we use that tea set all the time.

And I want my daughter-in-law to have the tea set.

I've told this to my granddaughter Aliya.

She loves the tea set.

She just loves drinking tea from it.

So I've told her, you know, I'm going to give the tea set to your mom when I die, and maybe she'll give it to you when she dies.

And Aliya is now torn between the ideas of wanting me to live forever, but wanting to get her hands on that tea set.

But already she's building the connection and she's learning to know the tea set in the context of loving me, and loving her mom.

And when her family uses it after I'm dead, it will be something that she already understands as something coming through the generations.

But anyway I want you guys to tell me where you are with this and what you're thinking and ... Did you have something?

Well, I just want to say that after going through with my grandpa .

.. standing over him and watching him die and suffer, I was like it would be so easy for me, to just take this pillow, you know, and, and be done, [Yeah ...] because it was such a long and terrible thing.

And so I think me personally after going through that, I think I could go and hit the morphine button for you [laughter] if that's what it ... if needs be.

If that's really what you want, then I will do it, and I will respect it.

[Gerda] You are so amazing.

[laughter] I think how you see life and death and how you see the cycle of life and death, it influences your feeling toward death.

And if you feel that death is just the most terrible thing that can happen to you and to your family, then I can see why you may want to postpone it to the very last minute of when your body will give in.

But for me there's great comfort in thinking about it as life and death having a continuity, because then my death is not just ... it's not a tragedy and it's not a catastrophe.

It's absolutely part of a continuum of life that goes back to the beginning of the universe, and will continue to the end of the universe.

[MUSIC PLAYING]